


Water Dries

by MysteryWriter36



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Angst, Anxiety, Brief allusion to self harm, Depression, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Fluff, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M, Pre-Relationship, Trans Aaron Burr, Trans Alexander Hamilton, those two are only mentioned, two cuss words
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-24
Updated: 2018-04-24
Packaged: 2019-04-27 12:38:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,087
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14425584
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MysteryWriter36/pseuds/MysteryWriter36
Summary: Deciding he wanted to pick up some ingredients and cook instead of eating take-out again, Aaron made his way back to his dorm to grab his wallet. Upon entering, he found that Hamilton was nowhere in sight. Then he heard running water. Hamilton was still in the shower. Which wasn’t weird, except for the fact that he was in the shower when Aaron had left to go to the library over an hour ago.





	Water Dries

**Author's Note:**

> Some HamBurr I wrote because I like to self project tbh
> 
> EDIT: I changed a couple lines close to the end that state Aaron as cis because I want Aaron to be trans, too. So, yeah. That’s it.

“ _What’s it like being Alexander Hamilton’s roommate?_ ” was a question Aaron got often. But after nearly four months of sharing a dorm room with said man, Aaron still had no clue how to answer.

Hamilton was loud and brash and opinionated, that was for sure. He didn’t seem afraid to speak his mind. He was also very flirtatious and friendly, seemingly unafraid to approach anyone on campus. Outside of the dorm, Hamilton was either trying to get a date or trying to start a fight.

The confusing part was when they returned to the dorm. Dorm Hamilton was different to say the least. He was quieter, kept to himself mostly, and was always reading or studying. He kept all of his personal things on his side of the room, and never touched anything of Aaron’s, not even a pencil or shared textbook, without asking first. He was private and guarded and the severe difference from his outside self almost scared Aaron.

Aaron felt like there was something he should be picking up on, but eventually the thought was pushed to the back of his mind and replaced by essays and projects and studying, until it came time for Winter Break. Aaron had no family to go home to, and neither did Hamilton, so he assumed they’d be spending the break together.

Deciding he wanted to pick up some ingredients and cook instead of eating take-out again, Aaron made his way back to his dorm to grab his wallet. Upon entering, he found that Hamilton was nowhere in sight. Then he heard running water. Hamilton was still in the shower. Which wasn’t weird, except for the fact that he was in the shower when Aaron had left to go to the library over an hour ago.

Something about it made Aaron’s blood go cold. Hamilton’s quietness, his occasional skittishness, the near silence in the room that was only marred by the muffled sound of water hitting the floor of the tub; all of it caused Aaron’s head to fill with so many awful possibilities of what was on the other side of the bathroom door. His worry for Hamilton’s safety and his curiosity ultimately beat his fear and anxiety, and he walked over to the door.

“Hamilton?” Aaron called out, knocking twice. There was no reply. The fear in Aaron grew as he grabbed the doorknob and turned it. “I’m coming in.” he said, hoping he was heard. But there was still no reply. He stepped inside the bathroom and was met by steam-covered glass and a wall of pure warmth. How the shower was still pumping out hot water was a mystery to Aaron. Then he caught sight of Hamilton’s hand resting limply on the side of the tub, the rest of him hidden by the shower curtain. Aaron was quite sure that for a moment his heart stopped beating all together. “H-hamilton? Alexander, please.”

The hand twitched and Aaron heard Hamilton finally respond, “Burr? What are you doing in the bathroom? I’m trying to shower.”

Air rushed out of Aaron’s lungs and he braced a hand against the counter. “Thank fuck,” he whispers.

“That really doesn’t answer my question.”

Aaron swallowed, opened his mouth, but the words wouldn’t come out for some reason.

“Burr?”

“I was so worried.”

“Worried? About what?”

“You. You’ve been in the shower a while and I just...I thought something happened to you. And it scared me.”

“Well, I’m fine, so...yeah. You don’t have to worry about me. I’m all good.”

“Are you sure?”

“I’m sure.” Hamilton bit out, sounding more like he was trying to convince himself.

“Alright then. I guess I’ll leave you alone, then.” Aaron said, making his way back to the door. His fingers barely had brushed the doorknob when Hamilton called out to him;

“Wait. Stay. Please?”

Aaron didn’t even have to think about it. He turned back and sat on the counter.

“I’m here.”

For a while, they both sat in silence, Hamilton’s visible hand occasionally tracing patterns on the side of the tub. Aaron’s hands stayed on the edge of the counter, gripping and releasing as he tried to steady his heartbeat. Finally, Hamilton broke the silence.

“You know how I tell everyone that my dad left when I was ten and my mom died when I was twelve?”

Aaron almost laughed because yes, everyone on campus knew Hamilton’s entire backstory, but this is serious, and the Hamilton spoke sounded so tired, so Aaron kept his composure and simply responded, “Yes.”

Aaron wasn’t sure, what with the sound of the shower being so loud, but he was almost certain he heard Hamilton laugh bitterly.

“I fucking wish that’s what happened.”

“So...what _did_ happen?”

“...I left.”

Aaron stared in Hamilton’s direction quizzically. “You...left?” he reiterated.

“I left. My father was only around when he wasn’t doing drugs, and my mother had...issues. I spent eighteen years being emotionally and mentally abused, as well as neglected, and I just couldn’t take it anymore. I spoke with my high school counselor and asked him to arrange it so that I could graduate early. I got my diploma in the mail a few days after Winter Break started, and I took what money I had and came here, since I got a scholarship. I lived in the motel at the edge of town until I was assigned a dorm. You know the rest.”

“I’m so sorry-“

“Don’t. It’s not your fault...”

After that, they lapsed back into silence for several minutes.

“I know you’re wondering why I cut my parents out completely.”

“Sort of. But you don’t have to-“

“I’m bi. And trans. And I knew...I knew they wouldn’t accept it. And after dealing with everything so long, the neglect and the abuse and the lying and shoving my feelings down I just-“

Aaron heard heavy breathing and sniffling, and he knew Hamilton was holding back tears. He watched the other man’s fingers slip against the edge of the tub, and Aaron immediately slid off the counter and knelt next to the bathtub, sliding his hand over Hamilton’s. Hamilton laced their fingers together and squeezed Aaron’s hand, and that’s when the flood gates finally burst open.

“I couldn’t do it, Aaron. I just _couldn’t do it._ I needed them out of my life. I’m so happy here. I have friends and I can be myself and I-“ Hamilton was cut off by his own sobs.

“It’s okay, Alexander,” Aaron whispered, shushing the other man, “You’re here. And I’m here. And you never have to see those people again. Everything is okay.”

Alexander pushed aside the shower curtain and locked eyes with Aaron, before looking down and nervously picking at the t-shirt he was wearing.

“Have you been fully clothed this whole time?” Aaron blurted out.

Alexander must have found the confused look on Aaron’s face amusing, because he managed to crack a smile.

“Yeah, I wasn’t really feeling good and you’re not supposed to wear a binder in the shower so I just put on a t-shirt and swim trunks. It’s uncomfortable, but so is dysphoria.”

Aaron nodded. He understood how bad dysphoria could be. He was glad he no longer needed a binder, even if he didn’t feel confident enough yet to go shirtless.

“I’d better turn the shower off.” Alexander said, slowly withdrawing his hand from Aaron’s and moving to the other end of the tub.

As soon as the stream shut off, Aaron asked, “When’s the last time you washed your hair?”

Alexander groaned. “You sound like my mom.”

“Alex, I’m serious.”

Alexander shrugged in response.

Aaron sighed and said, “Let me wash your hair for you.”

“What?”

“Let me wash your hair for you.”

“No, I heard you. But...why?”

“Because depression is a bitch, but I’ll be damned if I just sit here and let you neglect yourself. I care about your health and well-being, Alexander.”

Alexander gave Aaron a suggestive look. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you like me.” he said, moving closer.

“Perhaps I do.” Aaron replied, which completely threw Alexander off. “Now sit back and let me run a bath for you.” Aaron moved to turn the water back on, then paused. “Is that okay with you?”

Alexander nodded, humming an affirmative, and Aaron turned on the water. He fiddled with it for a moment before gently grabbing one of Alexander’s hands and guiding it under the stream.

“Too hot? Not hot enough?”

“A bit warmer.”

Aaron used his free hand to adjust the temperature. “Good?” he asked.

“Perfect.”

It was then that Aaron realized they were still holding hands, and he blushed and withdrew his hand.

When the bath was full, Aaron turned off the water, rolled up his sleeves, then grabbed the shampoo. As he squirted it into his hand, he looked up to see uneasiness on Alexander’s face.

“Are you okay, Alex.”

The man swallowed and nodded, then bit his lip and shook his head.

“The, uh...the hurricane- the storm that hit my town when I was seventeen, it...I have a thing about water.”

Aaron blinked, unsure of what to do.

“I know it’s stupid, I’m sorr-“

“It’s not stupid, Alex. And it’s nothing to apologize for. Do you want to get out?”

“No, I just...Do you think you could distract me somehow?”

“Yeah, of course. What should I do?”

“Ramble? O-or sing? Or something? I don’t really know...”

Aaron sat there for a moment, his heart breaking a bit at how lost Alexander looked, and how he wouldn’t even look at Aaron.

Alexander felt Aaron hands on his head, and nearly said something, but Aaron beat him to it.

“Hold me close, and hold me fast. This magic spell you cast, this is _la vie en rose._ When you kiss me heaven sighs, and though I close me eyes I see _la vie en rose_. When you press me to your heart I’m in a world apart; a world where roses bloom.”

Alexander’s jaw nearly dropped at the sound of Aaron’s voice. He really hadn’t expected Aaron to sing when he suggested it, but he certainly wasn’t complaining. Aaron sang the song twice before it came time to rinse Alexander’s hair.

“Can you lean back for me? I promise I won’t let your head go under.”

“Can you keep singing?”

“Of course.” And oh, the soft smile that his response elicited from Alexander was enough to make Aaron’s heart stop for an entirely different reason.

Aaron placed one hand on the back of Alexander’s head, the other resting under his neck, and gently lowered him into the water.

“And when you speak angels sing from above. Everyday words seem to turn into love songs.” Aaron moved the hand on Alexander’s neck to run it through his hair and get rid of the suds. Once they’re gone, Aaron gently pushed Alexander’s head up, and his eyes flutter open to meet Aaron’s gaze. “Give your heart and soul to me, and life will always be _la vie en rose..._ ”

The next thing Aaron knew, Alexander’s lips were on his. It was brief, but wonderful, and Aaron couldn’t help but follow the other when he pulled back. One of Alexander’s hands cupped his cheek, and droplets of water rolled down Aaron’s neck and seeped into the collar of his shirt. Aaron still had one hand on Alexander’s neck, the other braced on the edge of the tub. When they finally pulled apart, Alexander was the first to speak.

“Give your heart and soul to me...”

“And life will always be...”

“ _La vie en rose._ ” they whispered together, eyes closed and foreheads touching.

The moment was broken when Alexander jerked back.

“I got water all over you!”

It was at that point that Aaron realized the water front Alexander’s hair has nearly soaked his jeans.

“It’s okay, Alexander.”

“But-“

“It’s okay. Water dries. It’s not a big deal.”

“You sure?”

Aaron chuckles. “Yes, I’m sure.”

Alexander, sporting a mischievous grin, suddenly pulled Aaron into a hug, completely soaking the front of the other man’s shirt, and the suddenness of his movements caused some water to slosh out onto the floor.

“Are you still sure?” ha asked, laughing.

Aaron laughed along with him for a bit before pulling him into another kiss. Alexander kissed back, and Aaron’s heart was practically beating out of his chest.

_Water dries._

The wetness was temporary. But Aaron hoped this moment with Alexander would last forever.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Please leave kudos and comments if you enjoyed this! You can also find me on my tumblr @jacqueswrites


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